I wish that my emotions were not such a roller coaster...

I wish that my emotions were not such a roller coaster
Me, unwilling to jump on
Them, speeding seemingly to oblivion
I wish they were more gentle
More smooth to the touch
Between my palms and around them
Less of my immediate demise
Less my own cross to carry
Life is not hard
It is my emotions which are hard
Life does not bother me
In fact, it is easy
It is smooth
Ever vigilant in being constantly moving
Never stopping
Life is life
It is fine
Not my demise
A breeze
My emotions, a cacophony of noise roaring up from a deep place of discontent •

Mood disorders come with all manner of roller coasters. You could be experiencing depression, mania, psychosis, anxiety, suicide ideation, the hearing of voices. No matter your symptoms during a mood disorder, they can be trying. But what I had to learn was that my particular life was not difficult; rather, it was my emotions which caused me so much trouble. Once I was able to get my emotions under control through various forms of therapy, I could understand and appreciate how easy my life really was for me. It was then that I was able to be grateful for what I had. •

Poem from Acres of Shadow
© Aisha Tariqa Abdul Haqq Publishing
Follow @AishaTariqa for more original poems and inspiration •