Oh, to be tired, to want to just sleep...

Oh, to be tired
To want to just sleep
That is the depression we all cower with
That sick friend
Of ours who lays among us
Clinging
That thing so heavy we cannot shake it off
But so warm and soft we do not want to
We want to cling to it just as it clings to us
And to sleep
To sleep for eternity •

The weightiest symptom of depression I have experienced thus far is the sleepiness. Nevermind the lack of motivation, thoughts of inadequacy, and sadness. I experienced those too, however the unwillingness to leave bed even for important matters because of exhaustion has been the most impactful for me. For years I could not work, simply because I could not get out of bed early enough to be productive.

Anyway, it was after starting medication that I could wake at 6a and be out the door by 7.30a. Prior to then, even with a baby, I stayed in bed most days until noon. Now, I am not so sleepy anymore. I have motivation, my thoughts are more positive, and I am generally in good spirits.

There is such a large stigma against mental health issues. The beliefs are to eat a healthier diet and get more sunlight, and/or pray the sickness away. And some of these methods do work, however, they are only additions to an already comprehensive treatment plan. I was at my best when I finally got the assistance I needed. •

Poem from Acres of Shadow
© Aisha Tariqa Abdul Haqq Publishing
Follow @AishaTariqa for more original poetry •